Festival of the Dead (4)

-So you’re saying your condition improves while you’re here?

“Could it be that I have an aptitude for dark magic?”

-Ahahahaha!

“……”

This was getting awkward.

Every word Claire exchanged with Hecate was a struggle.

Despite Claire stating at the outset that she had a serious matter to discuss, Hecate was still acting like this. She had a terrible personality.

-Ah, ah… S-sorry. I wasn’t trying to laugh. It’s just…

“Just what?”

-It was funny.

“That contradicts what you just said about not trying to laugh.”

-Indeed it does!

Did I come to the wrong place?

Claire Ryan seriously contemplated whether she should return to her room right now.

-Claire. What you’re thinking is wrong. It’s quite the opposite, actually.

“The opposite?”

-For example…

Hecate pointed to a fireplace in the corner.

It was covered in a thick layer of dust, clearly unused for a long time.

After brushing away some of the dust, Hecate placed firewood inside.

-This is you, Miss Claire.

“The firewood?”

-Yes, and this is what’s happening in your body right now.

Whoosh!

With a gesture from Hecate, the firewood burst into intense flames.

The heat quickly became stifling, but rather than containing the flames, Hecate only stoked them further.

-Too much, isn’t it? Rather than providing warmth, it’s become scorching.

“……”

-This is you right now, Claire. And this is Necropolis.

Splish splish

Hecate began dousing the flames with a watering can that seemed to appear from nowhere.

Slowly, leisurely. She didn’t try to extinguish the flames all at once, letting the water flow continuously.

-What do you think?

“The temperature is just right now.”

-But what if we keep adding water? When we’ve given enough water to dampen the flames, what will remain?

“…Useless firewood?”

-Exactly. Claire, the comfort you’re feeling right now is a double-edged sword. It’s merely eroding your unseen essence.

“……”

By this point, Claire could understand. What was causing her body pain was the overwhelming power of holy energy.

She finally understood why Lost had insisted she read the Bible, almost to the point of tedium.

-The limit would be about a week, I’d say? Stay in Necropolis any longer and you’ll end up like this firewood – incompletely combusted.

Though not fully burned, the firewood was now soaked with moisture.

It would be impossible to use it as firewood again.

Not until all that moisture was completely removed would it catch fire again.

“But if we don’t control the flames, won’t it eventually burn up completely?”

-That’s why you need to learn how to control the flames. Not by forcefully extinguishing them with water like this, but gently.

Crackle, crackle.

Hecate used a poker to pull out a piece of firewood that hadn’t been soaked.

Small embers were visible inside the gray, charred wood.

-How long do you think this will last?

“…I’m not sure.”

-With proper management, it can last a long time. Long enough for a human’s purposes, I’d say.

“……”

-Embrace faith. You must make that fire your own power.

Hecate offered advice not as a trial, but as a senior in life.

Claire finally grasped her exact objective condition.

As she did, she noticed how the lessons Lost had been teaching subtly aligned with this.

‘Did he know about this too?’

If so, why hadn’t he told her? For a moment she wondered, but then Claire shook her head.

Even if he had told her, it wouldn’t have reached her. She fundamentally disliked Lost, after all.

Due to that strange antipathy, she would likely have rejected embracing faith.

Of course.

“…I don’t believe in gods.”

That remains true even now.

She doesn’t believe in gods. How could she? She who had grown up enduring all manner of hardships.

Her only treasure had been her brother who sacrificed so much for her, and even he was taken from her.

Did they think she hadn’t sought the gods herself?

No matter how much she prayed to the gods, nothing changed. That’s why she could only be skeptical of them.

-That’s right. It’s difficult for someone who’s felt betrayed to believe in gods. In your most painful moments, when you most needed help, you think they did nothing for you.

“……”

-But Claire, gods don’t directly save people. They only create opportunities. That’s the most they can do for people, being not truly omnipotent themselves.

Hecate’s expression turned bitter. It must have been the same for her.

In her most painful moments, her most difficult times, she must not have been saved either.

But she understands the reason why.

-To achieve something, you must give up something. Claire, when you prayed, when you were at your lowest point.

The gods watching over her hadn’t done nothing.

-Did you truly struggle with all your might to grasp those opportunities?

Her gods had always given her choices. The choices were hers to make.

Her becoming an undead like this, choosing to embrace people’s lingering attachments – those too were her choices.

-Not grasping those opportunities was your choice, wasn’t it?

“……”

-Claire, I call this something that all humans inevitably carry in their hearts.

Hecate reached out and gently stroked Claire’s head as tears began welling up in her eyes.

-Lingering attachment.

Claire had opportunities. Lost had said the same thing.

At the very moment Burke became a half-demon, there might have been some way to resolve things. If the demonic energy hadn’t reached his heart, he could have returned to being human, even if wounded.

But Claire had closed her eyes.

She had kicked away that opportunity.

Yes, Claire Ryan had failed to overcome the trial before her eyes.

*     *     *

The next day. After spending a deathly quiet night in Necropolis, we finished preparations to leave, though it was a bit early.

Given that strange woman’s personality, her treatment of us might completely change after exactly one day.

She might start facing me as a trial the moment 24 hours passed. Better to escape this city of death as quickly as possible.

-Aww… This won’t do.

“What won’t do?”

-How about staying to enjoy yourselves a bit longer? We have lots of fun things here.

“We’re in a hurry. Besides, Titan seems to have gotten quite beaten up, so it’s probably not good to keep him somewhere so dispiriting.”

Titan was badly injured.

Though I’d expected it, the trial before us didn’t know the meaning of “moderation.”

Titan sat in silence, his neck braced and splinted.

He didn’t seem pleased about being one-sidedly beaten either.

I’m not sure how the battle played out, but I guarantee Titan didn’t even get to see Hecate’s true abilities, let alone graze her clothes.

-Shall I heal him?

“Thank you for the offer, but…”

I’m not sure if she could actually heal him, but still. Former Saintess or not, she’s an undead now.

I could see her cleanly turning the already battered Titan into an undead and cheerfully declaring he can move better now.

-How unfortunate. Then let me give you some final advice.

“No, we’re in a hurry…”

-I won’t touch you even after the advice is done, so listen before you go!

Hecate grabbed my ankle as I tried to leave ungracefully.

Really, was she that starved for conversation? I never imagined the notorious ruler of Necropolis would act so unseemly.

“…Ah, yes. Go ahead.”

-Ahem! Then first, Titan-nim.

Is she planning to give advice to each person?

-A withered rose cannot bloom again.

“…I know that much.”

-You won’t achieve anything if you cling only to past oaths.

“Well, that’s some damn helpful advice you’re giving.”

-Isn’t it?

I’m not sure what it meant, but Titan’s mood instantly soured.

That too is a talent.

He hadn’t been this displeased even after getting one-sidedly beaten yesterday.

-Next is Linea!

“Yes…”

-Be careful not to get lost in beautiful memories of the past. It will only increase your current pain.

“……”

Linea nodded calmly. Another cryptic statement.

She must be doing this deliberately.

Everyone has something they’d rather keep hidden, after all.

But all her advice contained the same message.

They were all about something everyone had left behind. That is, lingering attachments.

-Lost-nim.

“Yes, Hecate-nim.”

-For you, I should say the opposite. Though your pilgrim-like journey is admirable, I pray you won’t try to discard everything. If you don’t understand the meaning and weight of abandonment, you’ll only suffer more later.

“…How much do you know?”

-Who can say?

She really is unpleasant. She spoke as if she knew I had returned from the future.

Moreover, she knew I was trying to break all existing memories and forge new relationships.

I know this is the better path.

Being able to watch over Burke’s final moments, Claire being able to harbor clear anger.

Everything has improved from before.

Breaking existing relationships allowed me to build better ones.

“I’ll keep it in mind.”

The being before me is a trial symbolizing “human lingering attachments.” And overcoming that trial means moving one step away from being human.

That’s what I am now.

I’m moving to cut off all lingering attachments to the past.

-It must be difficult. You probably prepared yourself for everything. But that final lingering attachment you hold in your heart.

Even I had lingering attachments.

There was something I endlessly clung to.

-Never let it go.

“That’s the first thing you’ve said that I like.”

Finding the Saintess whose face and name I can no longer recall.

That’s the only lingering attachment to the past I haven’t shaken off.

-And Claire.

“Yes.”

-I think I told you everything yesterday, Claire. I have no more advice to give. Because you’re in the process of changing.

“…I’ll try my best.”

Hecate smiled brightly and, as if in place of advice, handed Claire a wooden staff.

-This is a gift. The shepherd’s staff I used when I was alive.

“Shepherd…”

-This will help you, Claire, as you change.

Shepherd (牧者).

It means both a literal shepherd and a clergy member who tends to believers.

Just as she, as a Saintess, had guided young lambs bearing lingering attachments.

She must believe Claire too will someday become someone worthy of that shepherd’s staff.

-Well, that’s all. Time to look back at the past is over. Now you must turn your eyes from the mirage-like past and look forward.

“Thank you for your wise words.”

-Of course you should thank me.

What a shameless person.

But I finally understood why the <Wanderer> Necropolis is considered a trial friendly to humans.

Even though she died and became undead, she remained like a shepherd guiding lost lambs.

-Lost lambs seeking their way, may you meet death without regrets.

As she spoke, Necropolis, the ghost city symbolizing past and lingering attachments, began fading like a mirage.

And the final sight we saw.

Was that of an angel with pure white wings praying for us.

*     *     *

After Lost’s group departed.

-Whew, feels like I finally acted like a proper Saintess again after so long.

Hecate hummed as she returned to her room. It had been fun pretending in front of people after so long.

She even felt fulfilled by their expressions as they looked at her at the end.

She loves people.

She loves humans.

That’s why she willingly descended to the depths for them.

She defiled her once most noble soul by her own hand to become undead.

She is one who lightens lingering attachments, who resolves grudges.

A shepherd guiding young lambs.

-Hmm… So it’s like that after all?

Hecate lifted Mez’s head that decorated her room.

A head marked by countless sword wounds.

There was something only Hecate could see.

Wounds carved into the flesh that reached even the soul – a power approaching authority.

-You’ve started moving too, haven’t you?

She had lied. There weren’t just four trials connected to Lost.

A trial that even he hadn’t noticed was deeply involved.

That trial’s name was.

-Aranea.

The <One Who Strings the Blade>.